Dread and Resolve

I’m in clinic all day today and I’m on call tonight.  On call all weekend, actually.

Which means if I don’t finish clinic on time this afternoon, I’ll be running around trying to satisfy a bunch of people who are irritable about waiting, while trying to keep up with the demands of people who couldn’t be bothered to take care of their medical business during business hours.

That’s a nasty way to put it.  But, a surprising proportion of the calls I get are things like “I ran out of the medication that helps me sleep, and want a refill” (at 3 AM).  Um… so why didn’t you look in the bottle a week ago, notice you were running low, and call me for a refill then?

And having realized you screwed up, what piece of logic led you to decide that the doctor who worked just as many hours as you do deserved to lose HER sleep so you wouldn’t lose any of yours?

This is sort of a pre-rant.  I have been thinking about the many conflicting demands of my job – things like “give every patient as much time as s/he needs, but always run on time” – and feeling increasingly irritable with the no-win nature of my job. In order to do some things well, I apparently need to decide to be less than perfect in other areas. So I think I need to start pondering the tradeoffs and coming to some conclusions about the type of imperfect person I want to be – and if I do that here, perhaps others will give me feedback from different points of view.

So, I’m thinking from time to time I’ll report a story that seems unreasonable from my point of view, and see what others think about it. Not sure why I’m announcing it in this way… fair warning, I guess.

I want to be the person everyone thinks I am

I am noticing I am too responsive to criticism, and that it seriously impairs my productivity.

I get negative feedback about work I’m doing, and it’s really hard to go back and keep working on that project.  This is a serious handicap.

Not sure what to do about it, though…

Meanwhile, a couple of my friends seem to have this incredibly high impression of my productivity and competence.  They also make me feel like a poser. I wish I was as dynamic and successful as they seem to think I am.

Again, not sure what to do about that.  Kicking myself in the pants and telling myself to get to work just seems to have the “criticism” effect on me.

Update on Metro

Well, I sent email to their customer service people – which I’ve done before and never got any reply.  But this time, I implied in my email that I was representing a large group of people, all of whom really wanted a map.  I got the following reply:

“Thank you for contacting METRO. Our METRO RideStores have the large fold out maps for free. The closest one to you is located downtown at 1900 Main, right next to the Downtown Transit Center. You can jump on METRORail and be there in a few minutes from the Texas Medical Center. If you would like to order a large quantity, please contact Eric Atkinson in our Distribution Office at 712-739-3728.”

Now, the guy at the Med Center Transit center kiosk told me that they don’t carry the maps any more in the RiceStores, but perhaps it’s worth a trip downtown to see which metro official is full of it and which is actually helpful.  

Hey, maybe I’ll end up with a cool map to hang on my wall.  Wonder if I can walk in and ask for a half-dozen maps (one for home, one for med center office, one for non-med-center office, one for my backpack, and two to hand out when other people ask me where I got the cool map)?

 

The Houston Metro: Study in idiocy

Found myself thinking of the idiocy of the Houston Metro (public transportation), thought I’d rant a bit. The service is moderately well used, and after considering the circumstances I’ve decided that’s just… surprising.

Today’s observation is that there doesn’t appear to be anything resembling a real-life, paper, system map.  There’s a web-based PDF map that you can use to try to find your line; apparently you can even download it so you don’t have to be web-enabled.  This works OK for me, because I can pull it up on a 30-inch cinema screen and zoom to see a decent portion of the city with enough resolution to actually be able to read the line numbers.  But your average bus rider in Houston certainly doesn’t have a top-of-the-line screen and probably doesn’t have regular internet access! Not to mention it’s a 10 MB file, which is fine for high-speed access but again, is this standard equipment in the wards? 

It’s another way the digital divide penalizes the poor – those most likely to need reliable public transportation have to figure out the system in a hit-or-miss way, while those who have the resources to need the system well probably also have a car and a parking pass.

Grumph.

CiaraCat was talking about junk mail that seems to target the vulnerable – an issue that doubly pisses me off, since first I dislike being subjected to advertisement in the first place, and second I am offended by ads that try to get a sale by misrepresentation of any sort.

So one response that gets bandied about is to mail them back their own postage-paid envelopes, which gives them the cost of paying for delivery and paying someone to open the envelope.  Stuffing the envelope with something (shredded mail, old kleenex, etc) just makes the point more strongly.

When there’s no postage-paid envelope, what do you do?

At work, I’ve been playing around with some open-source, free software that effectively works as a PBX – allows you to set up automated phone calls at pre-determined times, to a list of phone numbers.

Would be (vaguely) entertaining to set up such a system on an unused line somewhere and use it to lash back at companies that use unsavory advertising techniques.  Could record a message about how upset you were to receive un-ethical materials from the company, and then whenever you get an ad you don’t like, put in the contact number and set the program to call with that message every 10 minutes for a few days.

Wonder if that’s illegal?

Cough medicine: advice and a rant.

This is a response to la_directora, who got given codeine for a cough even though she told her doc it made her sick in the past.  I started to reply to her, realized it was way too long for a reply, and am posting here instead.  The post will be divided into two parts – first, advice on alternatives to codeine for cough, and second, a rant or two.

First, practical pharma advice:

1.  For non-narcotic cough relief: benzonatate (brand name Tessalon) works great, is most definitely still on the market, is stronger than codeine for cough suppression, last longer than codeine (who wants to take a med every 4 hours when you could do it every 8 hours instead?), and has a lower rate of adverse effects than codeine. Both in the literature and in my experience, it’s superior to codeine in every way. Downsides of Tessalon – it makes many people sleepy and a few people get really goofy on it.  So not a good drug to take at work. It’s a great bedtime drug. Tessalon will also cause numbness or even paralysis of the mouth and throat if you’re stupid enough to chew it or suck it until it dissolves.  But it is a tiny little slippery gel capsule so why would you do that?

2.  For non-narcotic cough relief that won’t mess with your head, inhaled asthma medicines rock.  Atrovent HFA, an inhaled medication, directly suppresses cough (it’s an anticholinergic, and coughing is a cholinergic reflex – memorize this phrase and repeat to your doctor if you want to convince an ignorant doc to prescribe this).  In my experience, it helps more people than codeine or tessalon, and it doesn’t make you sleepy.  It’s my first choice for daytime cough relief.  Inhaled albuterol can also give relief, but has no direct impact on the cough reflex – it just helps you clear the irritation faster and reduces swelling.  But, albuterol can make your heart race and it wears off quickly.  Serevent is an extended release medication in the same family as albuterol which is less likely to cause rapid heartbeat. Advair mixes serevent and a bit of steroid, and is pretty effective for post-bronchitis cough (which can linger for up to a month).

OK, now for the rants:

First, codeine for cough.  Don’t get me wrong, codeine’s a really useful medicine for severe pain, I prescribe it regularly for that.  But, in head-to-head blinded comparison to dextromethorphan (the cough suppressant in nyquil or robitussen DM), codeine’s weaker than DM!  And they have similar mechanisms of action, so if one didn’t work the other is unlikely to help.  And codeine (and, actually DM) has addiction potential, which isn’t an attractive feature.  About the only thing codeine has going for it is that it’s a little safer for a fetus, so I suppose I might give it to a pregnant women (but would prefer to use one of the inhaled meds above, and just avoid treating the fetus at all).

So why do so many doctors prescribe codeine for cough?  I’ve yet to see a reason.  Patients mostly like it for the “feel no pain” aspect of it, which is nice but gets back to that addiction issue….  So rant number one is about how if my fellow doctors would actually look at the research, we’d see a lot less codeine being prescribed for cough!

Second – it’s a recurring story:  the patient says “doctor, I’m allergic to codeine, it makes me vomit”.  Then the doc looks down his long, snobby nose at the patient and says “that’s not an allergy, it’s a side effect” and then prescribes the med.  Um… it’s true the patient was not using the precisely correct terminology, but she’s still got a perfectly valid reason to avoid the drug!  Perhaps if she’s tried EVERYTHING else (including vicodin) and nothing worked, then it might be worth trying codeine.  But with so many other good options on the market, why on earth would you give the patient a drug that’s known to make her sick? 

OK, I’ll stop ranting now!

Shoes, glorious shoes

We decided that if we treated ourselves to a treadmill now instead of waiting for our birthdays (Aug and Sept), we’d be able to gift ourselves with improved fitness by the time of our birthdays.

So we got the thing delivered and I’ve been trying to use it.  Trying, but not really succeeding, because I kept having painful leg cramps when I tried to move any faster than a sort of enthusiastic saunter.

Noting that my shoes were fairly worn, I braced myself for the trauma of shoe shopping.  My usual routine is to go to the biggest source of gym shoes I can find (here in Houston, that’s a place called Academy sports) and try on every shoe in the place, and buy the pair that’s least uncomfortable. Yeah, I have mutant feet, why do you ask?

So today, in the course of an unrelated errand, I noticed a pair of running shoes on the clearance rack.  Hmmm.  Decent brand, amazing price.  Tried them on, they fit better than any pair I’ve tried in several years.  And did I mention the “amazing price” thing?

They had five pairs of shoes that, although they were in a variety of weird colors ranging from pink/black to bright orange, were the same size and style.  I bought them all.  Now am sitting peacefully with legs that are nicely tired but NOT cramped, and feeling smug about the fact that I don’t have to buy shoes again for a couple of years….

’tis the small pleasures of which a good life is composed.

So in the light of trying to keep track of what I do with my time…

Yesterday I… um… um…. What the heck did I do yesterday? Oh, yeah. All morning long meeting with review committee for conference abstracts, letting myself be roped into manning a “meet the expert” table at the conference breakfast (seems to be the plan for getting people to actually show up in time to be at the keynote speech after breakfast), smirking as one of the committee members ACTUALLY SAID “I think we should only accept this abstract if they agree to cite the paper I wrote 20 years ago on something relating to this subject”, then somehow agreeing to have lunch with same person, who turns out to be pleasant company when she’s not pimping her own work…

Met with someone to try to figure out IRB requirements for proposed study on persuasive messaging. Spent another 30 min on phone finding out how to get around the restrictions the first person told me about. Puttered around with the database for… far too long… trying to generate some numbers that would let us make power calculations for said study proposal. Emailed a dozen people setting up stuff for various projects over the next few weeks.

Read a book “Understanding Variation: the Key to Managing Chaos”. Unfortunately, it’s neither a useful source of information about how to run my own life better, nor is it an interesting treatise on complexity mathematics. Instead, it seems to be 158 pages of telling people how to do simple univariate statistics without admitting to them that it’s statistics. Let’s just say it was a fast read. MDA sent me a large stack of reading to finish off in the next two weeks – the rest are all papers rather than books, let’s hope they’re a bit meatier.

What else did I do yesterday? Must’ve been more…

Anyway, today I sat through a 3-hour class, met with people about study design (I think it’s finally shaping up), took care of some mundane paperwork, worked on a proposal draft, researched freeware automated telephone call software (if this career doesn’t work out I suppose I could become a telemarketer or run for office or something…) and got up the courage to send an email to my department chair asking for a meeting about my continued employment in the dept. Meeting is Fri AM – so by Fri PM I will either be really happy, rather depressed, or (most likely) still in limbo…

Have a weird commuting schedule on Wednesdays that involve driving to a shopping center lot that happens to have a nice central bus stop, catch bus to med center, walk from appt to appt at the med center, catch bus back to car, then drive to workout and then home. Was headed to my bus stop today, saw bus about a block behind me on the road, was trying to race it to the bus stop and realized how very silly this all was – who drives their car to the bus stop???

Shopped for something to hang my cell phone from now that the little clip it came with broke – found a sort of chain thingie with a carabeener (sp?) on one end and a sticky thing at the other – stick it onto the phone and presto, I can once again clip my phone to the lanyard I use for my keys. Stopped by to purchase shampoo. Yeah, I know, pretty boring. Treated myself to a bottle of some sort of fancy water that had apple flavoring and vitamins in it. Tasted like a Flinstone’s vitamin.

Worked out at the gym this evening and had my weekly “date” with Keith at Souper Salads, now am going to try to slog through another of these articles from MDA before bed.

Yup, another exciting day in the life of Tubin.

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